Shubh Diwali !

A very Happy Diwali to everyone.

May the light of wisdom, purity, innocence, beauty and love light up each of our homes and lives :-)

Wishing Well

Found an old notepad today and decided to fill it with stuff I want. Kinda like make a wish list...yes, I decided I'd use the whole notepad for this alone.

After the first 5 points, which included a digicam and a nice watch (currently eyeing a Tag Heuer), the list began resembling a 'to do' list. Points like 'a clutter-free room' and 'read all the books I've bought/borrowed before joining a lending library' etc., began appearing mysteriously on the list.

What's a girl to do when her dream 'wish list' begins to sound more like a practical daily 'to do' list?!

That sure brought me down to earth with a thud!

At this rate, my 'prince charming' will also turn out to be a 'prince yawning'...!!

Notes to Myself

Common sense reminders that I need to practise:

1. Stop thinking too much!! Especially on trivial matters such as blog identity! How does it matter as long as the point is to b-l-o-g?? Why does the location/presentation et al have to play as important a role than the writing itself?

2. Need to F-O-C-U-S on priorities here. Else, it will only work like the wave of a magician’s wand ending in hocus-pocus!

3. Stop being so paranoid! Have been feeling like a hound(ed) dog lately. If only it was Elvis the Pelvis doing the hounding ;)

4. I thought a plain and simple name would be common, but I made the mistake of adding a clever twist. It turned out to be unique and got me right back in the spotlight again x-(

5. Take multiple opinions, you never know which one helps lead you to the light at the end of the dark tunnel. Brings clarity and objectivity.

6. Learn to simplify. This is one reminder/new year resolution I have been making and breaking with amazing consistency. It boggles the mind how I can take a seemingly simple issue and complicate it till kingdom come.

7. You can run, but you can't hide! The more I keep changing my tracks, the more the scent of the trail continues to chase and discover me!

8. Learn to let go. I'm all tied up in knots. Can't cut loose from strings of any sort...

I need help! Is there a "blogiatrist" around with a comfy cyber couch I can take a much needed rest on? :D

Saturday Disasters

Cruel corporate slave drivers making us come to work on Saturdays! The worst torture there is! Employees come in looking either like they were forced to get outta bed or dressed ready to go partying! Either way, no one is in a mood to get any work done anyway, so how can they be expected to be productive?

There I am at work, sleepy as hell on a saturday afternoon, and bemoaning my fate, when a chat window pops up on my pc screen. The convo:

Colleague on 5th Floor: Good news

Janefield: what what???

Colleague on 5th Floor: but what do i get?

Janefield: hmm...its a saturday...so not much up for grabs :D

Colleague on 5th Floor: alright...then i will talk to somebody who might be interested :-)

Janefield: wait wait...sigh...what do you want? (resigned tone)...*anything to perk up a saturday at work *

Colleague on 5th Floor: Hee hee...one big rasgulla would be just fine!

Janefield: oh, is that all? Done!

Colleague on 5th Floor: yup, thats all i desire! great! now here is the good news...u dont have ur phone with you :-)))

Janefield: O SHIT (only now enlightenment dawns...no phone on desk...)

Colleague on 5th Floor: hee hee...i know where it is

Janefield: O GAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWD...! whr is it? whr is it??

Colleague on 5th Floor: for that another rasgulla ;-)

Janefield: o man...i can't believe this...i am priceless!

Colleague on 5th Floor: hee hee...its with K on the 4th floor

Janefield: what?? i'm on the 7th floor...how did it get there? how was it traced to me?? *praises the Lord and tries not to ask too many q's*

Colleague on 5th Floor: no clue...but she got the phone and as always my name was on the top of the list :D she called and i said hi jane! that's when she understood it was yours.

Janefield: i don't understand...why did she call you?? wait...let me call you now on your extension...!

To cut a long story short, the person who had found my phone (had left it in the bathroom!!) called the first recognizable (within office) name on my contact list. Phew...! I hadn't even missed my phone, did not even realize it was misplaced! Heights of saturday sloppiness! My precious new phone, that too, how could I been so careless!

Well, since this happened, I have misplaced the phone 2 more times, each time on a Saturday!! And have been lucky enough to have gotten it back as well, each time. The phone has probably spent more time in other people's hands than in mine! Now, I owe rossagullas, cakes, and god knows what next if I keep this up.... :-(

What do I need to keep on a tight leash? My phone or my scatterbrained mind?!

Accosted!

Why me??

This evening I'm minding my own business going for an evening walk with my music in not-my-ipod (:P) and enjoying myself, when this neighbor uncle stops me with a grin and a how-are-you.

Ok, so far so good. He enquires with concern about my foot (had a fracture a few months ago). He went on to tell me that someone in his family had to go through the exact same thing I did wherein surgery had to be done and a wire had to be inserted into the poor lady's foot.

Then he goes on and on about how he has spent the past week or two in and out of hospitals.

His wife's relative who is 66-plus slipped and fell in the bathroom. Her thigh was fractured and she had to have a knee operation. Then he said, "She cannot sit for the rest of her life."

Meanwhile, I was interspersing my comments with all these polite noises during the conversation and politely asked, "You mean she cannot sit down on the floor, right? She can sit down on a chair and such?" To which he replied, "Oh, of course, but she cannot sit down for the rest of her life, you know! So sad...but she can sit on the commode etc." (Excuse me Unkalji, I wanted to say, that's wayy TMI!)

Next, he narrates another incident of his hospital adventures of a man who had to undergo a prostate operation!!

But WHY was he telling me this??

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.....!

Yeh uncle log bhi na...uff !
It was so funny that I couldn't even patli gali se nikal jaoonfy :D

Life is a Highway

....I will ride it all night long!
(The title is another of my fave songs)

Vroooooooooooooooooooooom!
Finally watched the movie 'Cars' today. It was so cute! :D

I regress back to being a kid while watching animation flicks. In this one, the cars have personalities just like humans. The 'hero' is arrogant and the 'heroine' he falls for is sensible and sweet. There's his stupid best buddy with a bucktooth (on a car!), the serious old wiseman, the cheerful Italians (!), the annoying loudmouth opponent, the peace-lovin' (literally!) hippie van, the works! You actually feel for the characters (cars!) as if they were real living beings :))

Loved the voices, especially good lookin' Flo's of Flo's diner! Very obviously, an African American woman's voice and fun personality! The girly cars had eyeliner to denote eyelashes :)) And the bugs/insects in the movie were tiny cars with wings! (ok, now I sound demented :))

Love the way most animation movies teach such basic important human values of kindness, compassion, and friendship (and remind us of these once we are older and cynical) in such a refreshing, imaginative, and seemingly simple manner. They make you smile, laugh out loud, feel sad with a lump in your throat, make you go awwwwww, not to mention make you feel silly doing all that while watching cartoon cars! And the idea of two cars romancing each other by going for a drive together! Hahaha! So cute :))

Agree with Rediff's review though...Sally, the girlfriend car, should've been a Mustang, not a Porsche!

My new crush: Lightning McQueen's boyish li'l smile! :) Can't believe I have a crush on a car! Hahahahaha, tells you how bad I need a holiday from work, make that life! This movie provided just that for 2 hours :D

Thank you Walt Disney! Animation RULES...!

Glug...Glug...Glug

Drowning under a barrage of reports on science and technology. Why can't they invent robots to work on these masterpieces instead? High time I say!

No time to think, let alone energy to do anything, much less write blog posts!

This song (yes! yet again! :D) is currently apt.....METER DOWN...!

On a dance competition on TV, saw a celebrity couple do the rumba to this hindi song from a Bollywood movie about a taxi driver! Globalization anyone??

Bachelor Boy

Yes, yet another song, by Sir Cliff Richards this time.

But its also about this guy who is about to become a husband! Some of his friends and family decided to throw a surprise bachelor bash before D-day.

Only, the groom-to-be was clueless about it (and clueless in general, as well! :P). We were ordered by Tarzan to land at the venue well in advance (imagine arriving at a party early), and twiddled our thumbs and toes for a good hour and a half before Happy Singh showed up!

We did have a mini party of our own till he arrived. It was fun meeting up with people I hadn't seen in a while. P kept us in splits with her antics. This girl was happy as a camper with the streamers, balloons and crazy string cans! Her hubby looked on amused :-)

For some reason, the balloons occupied more space around the seating area and the balloons at arm's length from where I was sitting kept popping every now and then! P had a field day (night?) attributing it to my 'aura'. Yeh aurat bhi na....dekh loongi main usse! :-) Well, its gonna be sometime before I get to take a good look at her again, seeing as she's off traversing the high seas...will miss the party gal :-(

Tarzan was busy running around like a headless chicken trying to contact the Surd or rather the contact who was to get the Surd in :P A friend was to make sure he arrived safe and sound to the ones lying in wait...and boy, did we pounce on him! Typically, we turned off the lights and when he opened the door, he was greeted with screams and cacophony. Happy Singh could not have looked happier! Dazed at the reception, he stumbled in and quickly got into the party mood.

He was presented with a golden cup as though he had just run a 100 meters dash (more like the lemon and spoon race in Surd's case :-))). The cup wished him on becoming a "mixed double"....the party hats, party poppers, streamers, and balloons were brought out in all their glory. It had been a while since I attended a kid's happy budday....oops...it was meant to be this ultra sizzling bachelor bash with even an exotic dancer thrown in if some people had their way! It finally ended up looking like a 12 year old's birthday party only. Sorry Surd, but you will never grow up! ;-)

Happy Singh kept us entertained with his jabberings, all of which were surreptiously caught on camera. His lady love was also called across the airwaves enough times, after all, she was the other half of the mixed double, but was not in the same town. Happy's boss was the life of the party and ragged the Surd with full special effects! Surd ended up with cake, samosa and god knows what else on his thopda....LOL! A sight to behold, indeed it was! Confessions were extracted, blackmail and extortion were openly made for all to see and hear, and all this was caught on tape! God bless technology :-D

He even took the cliche 'break a leg' too seriously and instead broke a glass in all his excitement. Once he was on a roll, there was no stopping him....all the dialogues he came up with would have put even Salim-Jaaved to shame! The evening was mast and the party rocked. Wonder if the neighbours would agree though :P

Cheers to Mr & Mrs Happy Singh! Badhaai ho doston!
Wishing you guys a crazy, funfilled ride down life's lane together :-)

Helter Skelter

The title is another song.
Probably the first punk rock song ever.
Its by The Fab Four.

Have Answers? Need Fixing

The lyrics of this song best describe some of the thoughts in my head and the pain I am going through.

Fix You
by Coldplay

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse.

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream, down on your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down on your face
And I..

Tears stream, down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down on your face
And I..

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.

...And these lines best elucidate the emotion behind the above mentioned lyrics! Just the stanza and melody does a great job:

Killing Me Softly
by The Fugees

Strumming my pain with his fingers,
Singing my life with his words,
Killing me softly with his song,
Killing me softly with his song,
Telling my whole life with his words,
Killing me softly with his song.

Testing Times

Its tough, it is, to be strong and carry on with life as if all's well with the world.

You gotta keep going, they say. Even if your heart is breaking and shattering into a million pieces.

Going through pain can psyche the living daylights outta you, but watching a loved one go through stuff is much, much worse. Particularly when you feel helpless about it.

So why do good people suffer? What makes God test them over and over and over again?

Or is that only the strong are tested? To test their strength? To see how much they can take/bear? And what is the lesson to be learnt therein?

Or are people tested because they need to develop more strength?

They say the more people are tested, the stronger they become. But we are all only human after all ! Too many tests, and repetitive ones at that, can end up weakening or breaking one's resolve altogether. What is the point in living like a broken piece of fragmented china? Might as well just take it all away at one go, or at one blow.

Repeated blows leave one bruised and badly battered. There's only so much one can take.

So many questions....where are the answers?

Chand Phir Nikla

It is almost a year since I looked up at the moon!

Went up to view the lunar eclipse and was spellbound by the beauty of it all. Although it wasn't the typical full moon that inspires poets or romantics, it was still awesome. The shadows cast on the majestic moon were undaunted by its magnificence.

Had to crane my neck to look up at the moon and it was right above my head each time I moved! For someone who has a perennial neck sprain, this is not funny. The moon was playing tricks on me! Finally found a spot where I could support my back and lean against the wall. It was a sight to behold indeed. There was a white, yellow and a red-tinged halo around the moon, albeit at a respectful distance. It was really something else!

The superstition that people would go crazy if viewing the moon directly during a lunar eclipse is not unwarranted. How could anyone remain unaffected by that radiance and godliness? I marvelled at the moon casting its light all around. It was like I was seeing the moon for the first time in my life! Strange indeed!

Sigh....utterly gorgeous an experience it was. If only there was someone special to share it with! Not putting a picture, 'coz no image could ever do it justice. It will be all over the papers and telly tomorrow anyway.

All the paeans sung to the chand in Bollywood films don't come close to what I saw tonight. It took my breath away.

Of Yellow Lilies & Pink Gerberas

Instant Coffee!

Just shake, rattle, and roll on the road, and see the result :-)

http://ww3.mid-day.com/news/city/2006/august/142409.htm

Mouse Update!

We caught another one! And this one was tinier. Just a li'l baby. x-(

And the trap was in the balcony.

Aaaaaaarrrrrrrrrgh...

Instead of groaning and cussing about it, I am gonna take a cool attitude towards this whole shindig. See pic below.

Shopaholic Sistahs!

Shopping.....its a word that sends thrills through a gal and chills down a guy's spine. The anticipation of a shopping holiday is filled with such excitement among most gals.

And so it was that two pals decided to take off to Big Bad Bangalore over the weekend. Ze Zombie (ZZ) and La-La Lavs (LL) decided to raid Bangalore of all its textile and handicraft industries at one go!

Between the two of them, they practically emptied out Commercial Street. There are no stalls/shops left there and the road itself has worn down thanks to their marching up and down it all day. The shopkeepers are alternating between delirious shouts of joy and heartrending wails thinking about how quickly their stocks were emptied.

From strapless tops to golden shoes (yes, you read right), the gals returned with arms laden with loot aplenty. From feminine flair (flowery and dainty wear) to macho glares (roadside romeos), they experienced it all. Actually, they were rather disappointed with the apparent lack of goodlooking guys around. That too, in Bangalore! What is the world coming to?? Isn't there any justice left in this duniya?? Two gorgeous gals on holiday don't encounter handsome hunks?! Atrocious, no?

This tiny technicality, however, did not deter these determined-to-shop dudettes! They went about ransacking the best stores of Bangalore and also club hopped to their heart's content. So what if there were more scantily clad babes in the pub than interesting men? Huh! They tossed their (carefully salooned) hair and went about their business :D

LL is from LA and hence very la-di-dah, or so we like to tease her :) She is a gorgeous fun-loving babe with a limitless fun quotient and ability to laugh! ZZ makes everyone laugh with her antics and naan-sense! The two as a combo is rather deadly to beat!

They had separate seats in the train during the journey to Bangalore. LL hatched a plot to get their berths together by adding a twist to the already harebrained plot. She decided to give ZZ the role of a pregnant woman and announced to the people in the compartment that ZZ needed attention and hence she had to be with her in the adjacent berth, just in case ZZ gave birth in the train. ZZ decided to play along and promptly burst into a coughing fit. LL had to nudge her and remind her that coughing is a symptom of TB and NOT of pregnancy!!!

However, the poor men around did not seem to notice the difference and hastily gave up their berths to the one seemingly about to pop! Never mind that ZZ doesn't even have a paunch that can even be remotely mistaken for a pregnant woman's belly!

Ahh...the adventures of girlhood...a must for every young lady to let her curly or straightened hair down :D

More power to wimmin and ya-ya sisterhood! Rock on, dudettes!

Life

So what is it all about?

Its one puzzle no one has cracked yet.

Definitions a.k.a your version/take on life welcome.

Vande Mataram

What a beautiful song and melody!

Gives me goosebumps whenever I listen to it.

Very proud that it contains my name.

Who will bell the mouse?

Last night, I opened the bedroom door and saw a li'l mouse jump from a chair and scurry away to a corner behind my comp workstation. Promptly screamed and shut the room door as fast as I could.

A mousetrap was laid for Mr. Mouse with some food in it. Dad then turned on the AC at full blast, switched off the light, and shut the door. I simply HAD to ask why Daddy-O was turning on the aircon for the MOUSE. He said it was to freeze it out of its hiding place and come looking for the food inside the trap. Brilliant idea, no?! Dads !! :-D

Now, Dad had already suspected for a few days that there was a rat in the room. He had heard some "tok-tok" sound on and off and was sure there was something living inside the PC cabinet gnawing away at the wood. Either a lizard or a rat. I'd assured him that it wasn't possible as I would have known if there was one.

However, for some time now, each time I opened this cabinet, I would find 1-inch sized black droppings ALL OVER. Around the keyboard, the CPU, the UPS, etc. I'd presumed these were lizard droppings and that some creepy gecko was residing within the vicinity of my PC and had adopted the cabinet as its apartment. Each day I would throw those disgusting pieces of shit (no pun at all) away and carry on with using the PC.

Back to li'l Mr. Mouse...an hour later we found that it had been caught. Its long tail was sticking outta the trap. The trap was kept on the balcony for the rest of the night as it was too late to do anything about it.

I returned to the PC heaving sighs of relief that the worst was over. Boy, was I wrong!

There was a godawful stink emanating from inside the cabinet. I looked around the UPS/CPU, in the bottom shelves and other top shelves, but couldn't figure out what was wrong. As had become the norm, I found some more black droppings around and threw them out. Eventually, I discovered the source of the stink...

Mr. Mouse had peed all over the cabinet! There was fresh pee right next to the keyboard and near the mouse (the electronic one i.e.). The pee around the electronic mouse was in the shape of a footprint. Apparently, Mr. Mouse had stamped on its own susu and then proceeded to scamper ALL OVER my workstation.

I was completely freaked out by then, as if seeing the poor li'l creature wasn't traumatic enough. Stories about leptospirosis came to mind. Ever since it came to prominence as a fatal disease, it is the scariest thing on earth. Worse than AIDS itself! I slammed the workstation doors shut and ran from the room.

This morning, Mr. Mouse was still in the balcony sunning himself and doing hulahoops inside the trap, with its long tail sticking out. At noon, this man who had been asked to help arrived, and I heaved a sigh of relief on seeing him when I opened the front door and let him in. Informed him that Mr. Mouse was in the balcony.

This guy walks straight towards the bedroom. I politely enquired where he was heading. He said he had been asked to clean the cabinet.

Gritting my teeth, I asked him as politely as I could to please remove the offending criminal from the premises first. Mr. Mouse had already been living in the house long enough as an uninvited and unpaying guest. And after that, could he please come back and clean the cabinet without any further delay. The man gave me a pained look and did as he was told.

He spent the next two hours disinfecting every centimeter of the PC's workstation, with me for company screaming instructions from a safe distance all through, like a background symphony orchestra.

We discovered that Mr. Mouse had chewed away at the cable wires out of sheer hunger or boredom, I dunno which. The internet connection and printer wires had been nibbled at right in the middle of the wires.

Poor Mr. Mouse! Without any semblance of actual food, it had been feeding on electrical wires and the wood panels at the back of the cabinet and then of course proceeding to leave li'l black souvenirs all over for me to encounter.

I spent a good part of last night and half of today screaming my head off.

I dont think I can recover from this trauma for a long long long long long long time.

Copying the copycat !

A cool list to remember the stuff one got up to in the course of one's life and also some of the things one is yet to try. Not an exhaustive list though, there were more in the Chicken Soup series.

First saw this at TGFI's space who copied it from Greensatya, who got it from some other blog. Chain blogposts ki jai ho ! By now, its probably all over blogistan. Decided to join the herd (for once :D) and go with the flow.

An asterisk against the lines indicate stuff I'd really like to do and the lines in bold are ones I've already done, been there, done that types, but does not necessarily mean I would/wouldn't do again :-)

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink

02. Swam with wild dolphins * (dying to do this!)

03. Climbed a mountain

04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive * (vroooooooooom!)

05. Been inside the Great Pyramid * (is anyone in here? :O)

06. Held a tarantula

07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone * (ahem!)

08. Said 'I love you' and meant it

09. Hugged a tree

10. Bungee jumped * (freeee falling! what i'd really like to try, however, is to fly like a bird in the sky, soar upward, not spiral downward)

11. Visited Paris * (ooh la la, baby!)

12. Watched a lightning storm at sea * (after the Tsunami, not sure about this one) :-(

13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise

14. Seen the Northern Lights * (owwissitt?)

15. Gone to a huge sports game

16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa * (lift nahin hai, kya?)

17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables (not grown them myself, though some grew in my garden, does that count? can I bold the eaten part? :D)

18. Touched an iceberg (reminds me of the Titanic, burf ko wahin rehne do)

19. Slept under the stars

20. Changed a baby's diaper

21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon * (flyyyy flyyyy like a bird in the skyyyy)

22. Watched a meteor shower * (as long as they don't fall on me poor head)

23. Gotten drunk on champagne (you don't have to get drunk to enjoy it)

24. Given more than you can afford to charity

25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope * (3D effect)

26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment

27. Had a food fight (sheer waste of cake only)

28. Bet on a winning horse

29. Asked out a stranger (in this day and aids...I mean age?)

30. Had a snowball fight (not a fight, but played enough, and I think snow is overrated)

31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can (I can do better though...should keep trying)

32. Held a lamb * (soft soft and woolly wooly -- sheepish smile on face)

33. Seen a total eclipse

34. Ridden a roller coaster

35. Hit a home run

36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking

37. Adopted an accent for an entire day

38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment

39. Had two hard drives for your computer (4 actually)

40. Visited all 10 provinces

41. Taken care of someone who was drunk (not interested in the least in doing this again)

42. Had amazing friends

43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country

44. Watched wild whales * (NatGeo live!)

45. Stolen a sign (It would be a sign of the times)

46. Backpacked in Europe *

47. Taken a road-trip

48. Gone rock climbing *

49. Midnight walk on the beach

50. Gone sky diving *

51. Visited Ireland *

52. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love

53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them

54. Visited Japan * (wanna go there -- with patloon Hindustani)

55. Milked a cow (dun want anyone to ask the proverbial question -- got milk?)

56. Alphabetized your cds (what a nerdy thing to do)

57. Pretended to be a superhero (no pretending business, I want the real thing!)

58. Sung karaoke *

59. Lounged around in bed all day

60. Posed nude in front of strangers

61. Gone scuba diving * (the sea is incredibly fascinating to me)

62. Kissed in the rain

63. Played in the mud

64. Played in the rain

65. Gone to a drive-in theater

66. Visited the Great Wall of China *

67. Started a business

68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken

69. Toured ancient sites

70. Taken a martial arts class * (I wanna take me hiiiiiiya !)

71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight (ok, not D&D, but many, many other pc/online games)

72. Gotten married *

73. Been in a movie

74. Crashed a party

75. Gotten divorced

76. Gone without food for 5 days (3 days, yes)

77. Made cookies from scratch

78. Won first prize in a costume contest

79. Ridden a gondola in Venice * (will sing Great Gambler songs)

80. Gotten a tattoo * (this should ideally be half an asterisk -- still in two minds)

81. Rafted the Snake River

82. Been on television news programs as an "expert"

83. Got flowers for no reason

84. Performed on stage

85. Been to Las Vegas

86. Recorded music

87. Eaten shark (I'd rather die first)

88. Had a one-night stand (erm...)

89. Gone to Thailand *

90. Bought a house *

91. Been in a combat zone

92. Buried one of your parents

93. Been on a cruise ship *

94. Spoken more than one language fluently

95. Performed in Rocky Horror

96. Raised children

97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour

98. Created and named your own constellation of stars

99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country *

100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over

101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge

102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking

103. Had plastic surgery

104. Survived an illness that you shouldn't have survived

105. Wrote article for a large publication

106. Lost over 100 pounds

107. Held someone while they were having a flashback

108. Piloted an airplane

109. Petted a stingray (does patting the water in which a stingray was swimming in count?)

110. Broken someone's heart

111. Helped an animal give birth

112. Won money on a T.V. game show

113. Broken a bone

114. Gone on an African photo safari *

115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced

116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol

117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild

118. Ridden a horse

119. Had major surgery

120. Had a snake as a pet

121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon

122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours * (am soooooooo sleep deprived)

123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states

124. Visited all 7 continents *

125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days

126. Eaten kangaroo meat (I'd rather kill myself)

127. Eaten sushi (I'd be buried by now)

128. Had your picture in the newspaper

129. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about

130. Gone back to school

131. Parasailed

132. Petted a cockroach (eeeeeeuuuuuuugh!)

133. Eaten fried green tomatoes

134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey *

135. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school, and read

136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating (Not in this life and hope never in later ones too)

137. Skipped all your school reunions

138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language

139. Been elected to public office

140. Written your own computer language

141. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream *

142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care (would never stoop so low)

143. Built your own PC from parts

144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you *

145. Had a booth at a street fair

146. Dyed your hair

147. Been a DJ

148. Shaved your head

149. Caused a car accident

150. Saved someone's life

Change

Change -- the one thing we all resist

But (thank goodness), it doesn't ever resist us.


Changes
David Bowie

I still don't know what I was waiting for
And my time was running wild
A million dead-end streets
Every time I thought I'd got it made
It seemed the taste was not so sweet
So I turned myself to face me
But I've never caught a glimpse
Of how the others must see the faker
I'm much too fast to take that test

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Don't want to be a richer man
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Just gonna have to be a different man
Time may change me
But I can't trace time

I watch the ripples change their size
But never leave the stream
Of warm impermanence and
So the days float through my eyes
But still the days seem the same
And these children that you spit on
As they try to change their worlds
Are immune to your consultations
They're quite aware of what they're going through

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Don't tell t hem to grow up and out of it
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Where's your shame
You've left us up to our necks in it
Time may change me
But you can't trace time

Strange fascination, fascinating me
Changes are taking the pace I'm going through

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Oh, look out you rock 'n rollers
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Pretty soon you're gonna get a little older
Time may change me
But I can't trace time
I said that time may change me
But I can't trace time

Happy Birthday, Awoooooo!

Today is an old pal's happy budday. Dear ol' Anoo. What a riot we were together.....always crazy about music and movies, we could jabber on nonstop all day and all night.

She still has "cassettes" of our convos. It was more of a shock than a surprise when she eventually confessed to having recorded our phone convos on tape. There was enough ammo in there to turn into a Watergate scandal (for some listening to those tapes it would have opened the floodgates and let water run freely down their faces).

College days were fun filled, no doubt. There are tons of stories on all the antics we got up to, but those will be reserved for another day, another occassion.

This story is only about Anoo's antics. She came to visit me in my city a few years after we had parted ways. She was surprisingly extremely well-behaved (maturity? naah....only b'coz my folks were around) and looked great, which was also a new one! She came bearing those tapes as gifts and it was such fun listening to old gossip about friends, foes, and other unmentionables. Typically, we stayed up nearly all night yakking away about ze good ole days.

The next morning she went in for a shower and came out looking squeaky clean. I was immediately suspicious :D

She went into raptures about my wonderful collection of soaps and shampoos in the bathroom, all looking and sounding so colorful and exotic.

Now Anoo considers herself a woman of very distinguished tastes. She has traveled the world and many seas and is quite the die-hard designer dudette. Her huge collection of branded parfums and accessories all sourced from abroad or even from Khan market is well-known within her group of gals. So when she went all curious about the soap she found in the bathroom, I had to go and check which one she was talking about. She simply HAD to know what product it was and from where I had got it so she could buy a few dozen for herself at the very least.

I took one look at the soap in question and split my sides laughing.

Poor Anoo stood there gaping and tapping her foot in impatience waiting for me to catch my breath -- and give her an explanation for my inexplicable behavior. Soon I began to howl like a wolf or like the dogs in my street do at night. Anoo didn't pay much attention becoz she knows I'm crazy like that and often.

Eventually, after my laughing fit kinda subsided, I had to inform her that she had just bathed using my cute li'l doggie's bar of soap.

Exotic? You betcha !!

So, here's to you, dear one-of-a-kind Awoooo...oops...Anoo.....have a blast of a birthday and keep shakin' it !

You're our very own Soap Doggy Dog ;)

Honor Roll!

This blog is being policed by a certain women's morcha group forcing me to update my serene space (pls see avatar of glass tealight :D) here. Can't even meditate in peace and quiet these days. Kalyug hai, baba!

Having said that, I love my blogging sisters and brothers and also the ones I don't consider siblings :D and the fact that they come in here to check on me from to time is so touching. That some come in here just to give some gaalis is besides the point. :D

Today I discovered that I have been mentioned on a fellow blogger's blog. Not just on a blogroll (which itself is a good ego booster :D), but this guy, Harsha, has written a really sweet post on all the bloggers whose blogs he frequents and I got a special mention too! Yayy!! Thanks mate :-)

Back with a bang?

The big bang happened nearly 2 months ago. I am referring to my by now infamous foot fracture. Had worked from home the entire month of June and was on leave in July. Rejoined work today. The last entry in my work diary was 26th May, so yes, nearly 2 whole months later am back in my non-ergonomic chair at work.

Ah, nostalgia…on its own trip most of the time…

So two months--quite sometime and then again, not all that long either. Depends on how one perceives it. So why was I disoriented about everything workwise? I couldn’t find my way around my work files on the comp, I forgot the database numbers and how to access the global servers or network. To top it all, there’s the intra-office chat software (Sametime), which is both a lifesaver and a major nuisance at the same time. Messages kept popping up with people enquiring, “Are you back or are you still at home?” etc. The ones who came up to my desk and asked "How did it happen?" For the nth time I have to begin sounding like a broken record about it (considering making a banner and hanging it over my work station--about the grisly details of my accident).

So these people kept going “sssssssssssss” before I could even begin the tale. I’d start saying, “My foot…”, “Well…”, “Oh, you know…” and they’d immediately go “ssssssssssssss” and make a face like they couldn’t bear the pain. Wtf?!

----

Anyway, so those familiar with my orthopedic woes and shoes will remember that they are a size 9, while my foot size is only a size 5. Yes, I have tiny feet (thank goodness I wasn’t born Chinese, else they’d be even tinier). As for the shoe/slipper, it’s black and as you can imagine, there’s nothing elegant about it. Wearing pretty heels is totally out of the question for the next coupla months atleast. As if I wasn’t moping enough about this huge sacrifice I was forced to make, I come across something worse today. Yes, things CAN get worse. It’s Murphy’s Law.

I look in the newspaper and see a photograph. What do you know? The photograph had someone wearing exactly the same kind as my new size 9s! Boy, was I mad as hell. How could I not be thrilled seeing my pair of shoes famously splattered across the newspapers on the front page, you wonder? No sirree, I am most certainly unthrilled!

For one, they were white; and two, the person wearing them was the Tamilnadu CM, Karunanidhi! *wails loudly*

----

Later in the morn, I dash off emails to my super and local bosses (there are quite a few of them) announcing with fanfare my return to the premises.

Then, a coworker (CW) buzzes me on Sametime enquiring about my well-being.

CW: Hi Jane, how are you feeling now? Sorry to hear about your airline fracture.

Jane: AIRLINE fracture? *bursts out laughing and types hahahaha in CAPS*

CW: *silence*

Jane: CW, it was neither an AIRLINE fracture nor a HAIRLINE fracture, but a proper fracture, you know. But I am doing better now, thanks for asking :-)

CW: OH! *pause* I’m so sorry, Jane… (utter silence follows and no communication for the rest of the day)

Dunno if missing the H in hairline was a typo or CW genuinely thought that something like an ‘airline’ fracture existed!!

----

Work done for the day, I need to get home and look around for transport. In my present predicament, the only one available is a rickety rick (autorickshaw). After haggling with 3 rickshawalas over the rates (they all ask for 30 to 35 bucks while the actual fare is 20), I find one at the traffic signal. By this time, I am resigned to my fate and ready for yet another fight with a stranger. What all we do for savaari! Dunno which is worse though, the haggling in itself, or the haggling in my horrible Tamil. Determined to pay only the correct fare and not be exploited, I inform the rick driver where I needed to go.

Driver: Ok, I will come. It will cost irruvadu ruba.

Determined Jane: Nothing doing!! I will pay only 20 bucks. That's what I pay every morning and that's what I will pay every evening also.

Highly amused driver: That's what I said....irruvadu ruba IS 20 bucks!!

Sheepish Jane: HA! Errr...*tries to save face*...which route will you take? I will choose the route!

Driver: Okay (grinning widely)

Sheeesh!

I finally arrive home only to realize I had forgotten to carry the keys with me in the morning. I'm locked out for the next half an hour.

What a day!!!

Makeover

New day, new look, new design.

Howzzit?? Do send in your ayes/nays. Not a survey of 'coz, just another perspective.

Its refreshing to me from all that black, altho' I did love that color.

Orange reminds me of vibrance, not that I'm feeling vibrant or anything, but it's also a color I likes the muchly.

Man, I can see clearly now!! (beautiful song...don't remember the singer now). The text, the links, the damn punctuation, everything is clear as day...wow! I feel like I've had an eye operation and can see. I wish the image in my head of Nirupa Roy in a 1970's film had not just popped up.

Ah...googled the song and found the whole deal. Such simple lyrics and a peppy li'l melody.

"I can see clearly now"

Sung by: Anne Murray
Composed by: Johnny Nash

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

I think I can make it now, the pain is gone
All of the bad feelings have disappeared
Here is the rainbow I've been prayin' for
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

Look all around, there's nothin' but blue skies
Look straight ahead, nothin' but blue skies

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

That was my blog singing, by the way.

:-)

Test

Just checking to see if this works.

Here goes: To the blurry govt. that bans freedom of speech and shamed this democracy, this one's for you.

_l_

P.S. The blogs are back up and running as usual. The ISPs have unblocked the hosting sites such as blogspot, typepad, and geocities. Praise be to Allah. The govt has acted swiftly as usual and for once, all for a good cause, thank goodness :-D

Ladka Hua Ya Ladki??

Meet Ipu--one of the third generation of kids in the family, a.k.a. Gen Next.

Androgynous already?

Kids start off early at everything in life these days!

And what do we have here?

What a cute li'l thing, wearing a dhoti and hair clips...

The costume was my gift, guess I confused the poor soul and its mother, hahaha! :D

O Ogden!

Ogden Nash -- One of my fave poets.

His crazy verses always give me a chuckle.
Some of his short and light-hearted lines are below.

Ode to a Baby

A bit of talcum
Is always walcum.

The Cow

The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other, milk.

My Dream

This is my dream,
It is my own dream,
I dreamt it.
I dreamt that my hair was kempt.
Then I dreamt that my true love unkempt it.

Further Reflections on Parsley

Parsley
Is gharsley.

The Guppy

Whales have calves,
Cats have kittens,
Bears have cubs,
Bats have bittens,
Swans have cygnets,
Seals have puppies,
But guppies just have little guppies.

The Abominable Snowman

I’ve never seen an abominable snowman,
I’m hoping not to see one,
I’m also hoping, if I do,
That it will be a wee one.

The Wasp

The wasp and all his numerous family
I look upon as a major calamity.
He throws open his nest with prodigality,
But I distrust his waspitality.

What's the use?

Sure, deck your limbs in pants,
Yours are the limbs, my sweeting.
You look divine as you advance . . .
Have you seen yourself retreating?

What’s your W.Q.?

I’ve decided to attack two tags as well as kill my laziness to do them at one go :-)

1) List atleast 5 weird things about yourself by Aarti
2) Weird things you do/did at your workplace by Sayesha

Tag 1

a) Billions of blue blistering barnacles, I have a multitude of names. Name-calling ain’t so terrible anymore! Rolls off me back like water off a duck’s (no reference to TGFI here :P)

b) Thundering typhoons, I also have a multitude of email ids. When I first joined blogosphere, I signed up for my first ever email id at Rocketmail. It had a real cool looking interface, but eventually it was bought over by Yahoo! and all the coolness quotient vanished. In quick succession, I registered for email accounts at Hotmail, Yahoo! (4 totally, 1 is solely for messenger), Mailcity — which was renamed to Lycos eventually, Email.com — which is now Mail.com, Rediffmail, Sify, Care2, and a whole host of other free email service providers that I can’t even remember now. Now I use 1 Hotmail, 3 Yahoo!, and 1 Gmail ids. Couple of the above-mentioned ones are still in existence and I check them once in a blue moon.

c) I have two pairs of glasses (spectacles). I keep one pair at home and the other in my desk drawers at work. Since I only need glasses while using a PC, these are kept at two different locations.

d) I had 26 pairs of unstitched a.k.a yet-to-be-tailored salwar suits as of this month. There are also some 10 odd pieces of ‘material’ or cloth that was purchased to make tops/kurtas out of them. Although most were bought eons ago, they have been carefully stored in the closet. Don’t ask me why, I have no idea. I have a closet bursting at the seams. My cousins and friends think I should hold a sale or open my very own store! At the rate I’m going, I can even open a branch or two! Earlier this week, I gave 3 pairs of suits and 2 pieces of material (to make kurtas) to the tailor. Two different tailors in the vain hope of getting them back around the same time. No such luck, one tailor is taking one week and the other two weeks. I also ended up buying yet another salwar suit the same day! In my defence, it was a beautiful chiffon outfit with Parsi embroidery, something I don’t own. :-D

e) I haven’t counted exactly, but I own at least 16 pairs of shoes. Out of which, I regularly use only 2 or 3 pairs for months on end. Now of course, I pretend like I’m walking on the sand at a beach resort since I’m barefoot most of the time after the toe fracture.

f) I have spent a whole night yakking on the phone during college days. Think this has happened on more than a couple of occasions. Have also been online for as many hours and more at a stretch. Spending time online only happens when I’m stuck at home for a while, when I was job hunting and now that I’m homebound. A daily work/study routine fixes this addiction automatically.

g) What’s weirder is how this tag has turned into ‘numbers of this, that and other’.

Think these will do for now. There are way too many weird things about me than I’d care to acknowledge :-)

Tag 2

a) My workplace (popularly known as Siberia) does not have uniform airconditioning. It’s like that commercial with Eskimos in one corner and people covered in layers of clothing and in another, there are camels and people peeling off their ties and sweating buckets. Ewwww! I know! Similarly, at Siberia, you will find some areas with people bundled up in jackets, sweaters, shawls and even monkey caps, and some people with all of these on! And then there are other corners with people wearing next to nothing (ok slight exaggeration, but I swear there are some people who at least wish that people would wear next to nothing :-)).

My seat initially used to be in the Arctic zone and I eventually succumbed to the eccentricities when parts of me began turning blue with the cold. So I stuffed my desk with a few essentials. I had picked up this beautiful Kashmiri shawl a year ago at a charity auction. It was an alternative to Pashmina shawls, though almost as soft in texture. I knew there would hardly be an occasion to use the shawl in Chennai, but thought it would be great for Mom when travelling to places with cold climes. And what do you know it came in handy for me in this city itself! From being relegated to the back of the closet, it was brought out to be used and displayed. So I took it to work and kept it in my desk drawer. Friends would vie to get their grubby hands on it and wrap themselves in it ‘coz it was so pretty.

Despite its beauty, the shawl wasn’t enough to battle the cold, so I also took along a pair of socks. I would put them on every morning after arriving at work and take them off whenever I needed to use the restroom or during breaks or if I had to leave my seat and go to some other part of the office. I would put them back on again upon returning to my seat. Irksome, it was!

Sometimes, we take breaks to stretch our legs by walking down the stairs (7 floors down) and then walking around the building a few times. Once I was taking a break and went down to walk about with a friend and realized halfway through the 2nd round that I still had my socks on. Had forgotten to take them off before leaving my desk! I happened to be wearing a salwar that day, not even pants. There were lots of people around and some might have wondered why this girl was wearing socks in the blazing summer heat of this tropical state! My friend had a hearty laugh at my expense and discomfiture. I figured there was nothing I could do about this embarrassing situation, so might as well carry on with the walk and break and then return to my desk :-)

b) An internal chat service/instant messenger is available and meant to be used only for “official purposes”. You can bet, however, that it is used for anything and everything but work! So people buzz each other to say stuff like:

-- You are an idiot!
-- I’m hungry, let’s go get a bite to eat.
-- What are the lyrics to ABC, do you remember? Can't get the tune outta my head...
-- I’m ordering juice, would you like something? (Reply: I’d rather have chocolate cake.)
-- Himesh Rishammiya needs to be shot dead!
-- The boss (nickname will be used so that MIS would have to use their detective skills in case the conversations were tracked) is a jackass!
-- Click this link at once! (some silly article on MSN/TOI)
-- I love Johnny Depp and hate Brangelina!
-- Did you read XYZ’s blog?! Omigawd...!

This software is also put to use for other important uses such as gossip about coworkers and lovers' chats/tiffs.

Just like MSN, the chat client's contact list can be categorized into team/managers/big bosses/trainees/other teams/friends/ciggie supplier or coffee man (just kidding) etc.

Once I received some ridiculous astrological prediction via email about marriage. I had to share it with a few friends who I knew would have found it equally hilarious. I pressed the Ctrl key and randomly selected a bunch of names across different categories on my contact list, to send them the same message at one go. This is called sending an "announcement" and will flash on the receiver’s screen immediately. I did not know that announcements selected across different categories would go to all the people under that category, not just the names selected. It turns out my "matrimonial joke announcement" went to my boss, my coworkers, HR and other random acquaintances apart from my friends! I managed to provide amusement and a break to quite a few people that day!

c) My boss at a company I'd worked in earlier had a car in the same model and color as mine, and as per parking lots provided, both cars were always parked next to each other.I was not in my manager’s good books for this sole reason! This parking situation could be seen from inside the office. The lady boss could not digest that her subordinate had a car, much less the exact same model and color and had the audacity to park it next to hers. Some people! *rolls eyes* This is probably a weird fact about my boss rather than about me, but it was one helluva weird situation (oh, weird bosses would be a whole other list!).

d) I later graduated to a two-wheeler when I changed jobs. Yes, it’s usually the other way around for most people, but what with increased traffic and parking problems not to mention obnoxious bosses, I found riding a bike to work more convenient. Plus, I've always been different :P Had booked a bike and was awaiting its arrival. Had not yet fully learned how to ride one. I had to visit a client and for once, decided to borrow my co-worker’s bike instead of risking life and limb in an autorickshaw. Well, a rick would have been safer than a bike. Anyway, I nearly ended up risking his vehicle and the lives and limbs of people walking on the road while bravely attempting to maneuver the bike on traffic congested streets.

e) I can’t sit at my desk in an upright position for too long. I get uncomfortable within a short span of time and then sit cross-legged or with legs folded one below the other, or stretched out under the desk and resting on a stand/the overturned dustbin.

I can think of plenty of weird happenings/co-workers/bosses at the different places I’ve worked. Many of them weirded me out so much, I was probably the only sane person around.

And that’s saying a lot about my weirdness quotient!

Putting My Foot In It

1) Into the shoe: For a shoeaholic like me, it's a sad state of affairs indeed. Having fractured my left toe a little over a month ago, it was like being cavewoman. I hardly stepped outta my cave...err...home for days on end and was barefeet for a whole month. Didn't step out even to catch the sunlight. Today someone tells me that sunlight is good for bone strengthening and especially for fractures. Better late than never info, I guess. So anyway, there I was, foot swathed in bandages and cotton and what not for all this time, and now finally, I can walk...I mean...limp free. Only...it ain't the Neanderthal age, and realized I needed to cover up my feet. None of the couple of dozen odd pairs of shoes I own fit now thanks to a swollen foot. One swollen foot that is. The other foot is fit and fine. What a dilemma! Tried Dr.Scholl's footwear, other brands, and popular stores, but nothing seems right. Everything fits on my right foot quite comfortably, but nothing fits on the left foot. Have heard of hair and nails growing longer and paunches getting larger in a month, but a whole foot?! A shoe of size 6/7/8 (varies depending on the brand) decently fits on my right foot, but only about 2 sizes bigger than that fits on the left foot. *slaps forehead*

Finally, found a pair today (size 9!) that is really comfy 'coz it has a slight arch, all other soles were flat. Its not a micro-cellular-rubber (MCR) pair according to the store owner, but an MCP one. Of all the shoes in the city, the MCP one fits! The P in this acronym stands for 'polymer'. What were you thinking? :P Anyway, the store owner, after hearing the sordid tale of my accident and feeling all queasy about it, proceeded to force his choice of shoes on me, and lecture me worse than my doctor or my folks ever did! Uff! To top it all, he avoided all my queries on the prices of the shoes. Eventually, when my patience showed signs of running thin as well as the smile on my face, mom whispered that he was hard of hearing! Finally chose a pair that had nothing to do with supporting the fractured toe, but was comfy in all other aspects! Why can't they make pretty medically supported footwear? Why do looks have to take a backseat when it comes to comfort? Why can't shoe designers spend their time designing pretty orthopedic shoes? The prices are high anyway! Arrrrrgh! And the store fella acts like my grandmother! Had a good mind to stomp and yell, "my foot!" at all his droning.

2) Into my mouth: After the very 'happening' evening (see above), I watched TV, had dinner, and got online. Found a friend online whose leg I thoroughly enjoy pulling and began the old routine. This pal is always game for a few laughs and bravely ventures teasing me back, also as per routine. Only today, she was in 'durga mata' avatar. I had no idea she was down in the dumps/fuming away (she was alternating between the two emotions like a pendulum) on the other side of the intangible net. Online chats are so misleading. You never really know what the other person is actually thinking, feeling, and even saying. Although I could sense she wasn't in the best of moods, it didn't deter me from ribbing her a bit. Next thing I know, another friend calls and gives me an earful. Got fired left, right, and center today. The friend who had called was discussed in the online convo and Durga Mata messaged the Furious One. A silly incident blew the whole thing outta proportion and my li'l prank backfired bigtime. Total miscommunication gap! Is it Amavasya or something? Jeeeez! According to me, both overreacted and jumped the gun and to conclusions, which they otherwise wouldn't have. Now they are hurt and upset! Apologized to both to soothe frazzled nerves, but still feeling lousy.

End of the day, not only am I nursing a big foot, but also a big mouth.

Identity Crisis

Main kaun hoon? Main kahaan hoon? Uffo, main abhi tak yahaan hoon!! :P

What's in a name they say? I did a bunch of 'what is your name in this country's language' quizzes on blogland and discovered Japanese, Italian, Spanish, French et al versions of my name. Got bored with that eventually. I continue to use a rather 'German-sounding' version of my name on email.

When I was a kid, each of my aunts had a different goofy 'pet name' for me. It was painful writing them thank you cards for their gifts trying to remember which name to sign off by, based on what they called me. Interestingly enough, whatever they called me, became the name I called them back, with an 'aunty' attached to it at the end! The names are just so ridiculous, but now I can look back at them and poke fun at them and at myself for going along with it.

Sample this: One aunt decided to hum when she addressed me, so I was christened "Gun Gun" and she became "Gun Gun Aunty". Dunno if there was some competition going on like 'Tag this kid with the most embarassing name', but the aforementioned aunt's sister decided that "Mun Mun" it is, henceforth, and of course, she was "Mun Mun Aunty". The squabbling sisters had another sibling who then promptly christened me "Minna". Atleast there was some logic to it as I was a tiny baby, a bit underweight even. (Those familiar with my size now, shall not comment and can just put a sock in it :D). Now, these aunts weren't masters of the game after all. Their mother and my beloved Naaniamma was alive and well then. Un sab ki amma nikli and she passed an order that the new kid on the (execution, in my view) block shall hereby be referred to as "Shammu". When I visited Disneyland, the most popular act was that of "Shammu The Whale". I somehow lived it down, kinda helped by the fact that the whale was cute :) Never mind. Till date, I call my uncle (the brother of all these aunties and Naaniamma's son), Shammumam. I have no clue how that connection was made. My guess is he was the only one who abided by Naani's grand orders and called me "Shammu", and hence he was introduced to me as "Shammumam". Now, can the father of all these wonderful people be left behind in this prem kahani? No sirree. Naaniammi's husband and my dear, sweet, adorable granddad officially named me 'Poornima' since I was born on paurnami ki raat, aka, full moon night. AAAAWWWOOOOOO! Ahem. That was quickly shortened 'affectionately' to "Punimo!" Yes, with an exclamation. 'Coz he used to yell out my name like that in public. This was of course once I was older and could run as far away from this crazy bunch as my two li'l legs could carry me.

Mum and Dad were on their own trip back in those days. Literally. Mom was tripping on being a new mom, all rosy cheeked and glowing, and Dad was on his own trip in Calcutta, post IIM days. They were high on life and love, among other things. Innocent stuff like music, friends, clubs, and parties of course. Ze good life, basically. And food! Boy, oh boy, what a food loving family I'm a part of. Which has no doubt left a telling and lasting impression on my adult life. Anyway, I digress. So Dad got wind of the name given by his dad-in-law and put his well-educated foot down. He was just coming out of a hangover of its own kind after pocketing an MBA and had joined an MNC, only back then, apna desh was still UK dominated and not the US of A based MNCs of today. So he said "Poornima" was a terribly old fashioned name. After spending a lot of time hunting for names, he gave me a typical Bengali name. Kolkata hangover I guess. In between, he had almost finalised on "Suman" and even wrote a letter to his mom about it. I still cherish that letter though it is in tatters. Dad also christened his youngest sister "Asha" and the basis of that was that the day she was born, he had seen a Hindi movie and the pretty heroine's name was "Asha". Ahem. Anyway, Mum and Dad, going by family tradition, bestowed upon me a pet name and that was "Chotu". Ok, you can stop laughing now.

By the time I was three, responding to so many names must have taken its toll. As I grew up and smartened up a wee bit, I developed 'convenient hearing ability'. Whenever someone called me by one of the above crazy names, I would act like I couldn't hear them. In school, of course, it was my 'official' (Bong) name. Can a kid be more tortured, you think?

Once I started using the net, I simply couldn't think up any nicknames for myself. Bland stuff like 'zodiacgal' was my handle on chat only because I was hung up on reading the astrological columns in magazines and Linda Goodman's book about Sunsigns enthralled me as a teenager. Picking a nickname for email accounts, chat handles etc., gave me nightmares. I took hours and even days to think of something, well, a little less ridiculous than the ones I've suffered while growing up.

I had 'name block' like writer's block for a while. Now of course I am a pro at different names and even identities. Played the fool online enough times under god knows how many nicks and personas. When venturing into blogworld, I suffered from 'name block' again. And Kini suggested I stick with A Jane. This one was also thrust upon me by him and Sayesha in some silly name calling game :P Kini got a bit cleverer (for once) and suggested 'Jane Doe'. I listened to him (for once) and it became my url. But for my 'posting' name, I was bored with that and so decided on 'The Chosen One'. *rant alert* After all, wasn't I 'chosen' for all those idiotic names as a kid? *end of rant* Besides that, back in college, my fave phrase when something unfair happened to me was "Why me?" I even had a Charlie Brown poster in my room asking that question. So I would wail and groan "WHY ME?" and my friend would reply, "Because you're the chosen one!" So that became the blog posting nickname. I wondered if it sounded weird, but heck, I've always been that way. Chosen, not weird! Ok, maybe a bit mad sometimes. :D

Most people on blogworld liked it and thought was different from the usual. This guy thought it was an ode to Neo! :) Others thought it was silly, or even sounded pompous. If only they knew!! Dishoom happily shortened my blog nick to TCO, which sounds suspiciously like PCO.

Today, however, someone said it was cheesy. Heck, it was my cheese to move, you know? So now I am The Cheesy One. *cheesy...err...cheeky grin*

With friends, my nicknames have gone the range from Sugar, to Hanuman, to Gabbar Singh.

Sigh...seems as if my tryst with names will carry on into my afterlife avatar as well!

Life's a Beach

They collapsed into the sand
Their faces turned up against the breeze
Their laughter ringing in the air
Casting a spell across that silent night

The lone boat cracked right down the middle
A mute witness to their chatter
With only the beam of the lighthouse casting a warm glow
While they drew circles in the sand

They had given up building castles in the air
Long ago when time dealt them a cruel blow
Now they were stronger and could swim against the tide
And yet between them was a great divide

The future lies ahead of them
As vast an expanse as the sea's horizon
They walk barefooted towards the water
Holding hands as they were always used to

They look around at all the jewels cast ashore
And promise to build a foundation for the future
At last their eyes shone in the moonlight
A meaningful purpose was finally in sight

Travelize it!

This was so hilarious I had to share. Below is a link to a travel blog written by Dharmu’s boss. Obviously, I have met neither Dharmu nor her boss (a Westerner) in person, but only read their writings. When I clicked on the link to her boss’ blog, it was only out of curiosity to know more about her company and work. Had thought it was a link to her company website. Instead it turned out to be the travails of her boss’ travels to India. Always interesting to see how the white world views the brown one. The particular post of his that I’ve linked here is a cool description of our very own Landmark!

The travel blog web portal is also neat. Wondering if I should open one on my travels there or pen/type them here. Hmmm….any suggestions?

The View from the Other Side

A Positive Platitude

Just Five Points, Mr. Chetan Bhagat!

At long last I managed to get my hands on the book ‘Five Point Someone’ by Chetan Bhagat. Much has been said and written about it, so I’ll keep it short. This book seems to have become the mantra for collegians and those of us still nostalgic about the ‘good ole days’. My all time fave in this kind of genre, though, continues to be ‘The Inscrutable Americans' by Anurag Mathur.

Here’s my (late) take on this college tome.

Feedback for FPS comin’ your way, Chetan… (Mallus reading this, pls make sure you get the pronounciation right).

1) GPA GPA GPA!! Oho! That might be the mantra at IIT, but for the world over, Gen Next is only interested in GAP GAP GAP!!

2) Take 3 losers, mix in some Floyd, grass, and vodka, and voila! A ‘novel’ dish targeting the youth is rustled up. Ice in the vodka? A smash hit bestseller and raking in the big bucks. Sweet! Who cares about dessert, right Chetan?

3) The heroine angle, Neha. The only ‘flavar’ among the nuts, bolts, and gears. Not much of a crowd puller though. More Betty than Betty Boop. The ‘kya maal hai’ factor is missing. Shilpa Shetty ko bulao! Item gal maangtha hai. In this Archie & Betty caper, Veronica is sorely missing.

4) The humor and simple lingo style of writing was ‘jhakkas’. But, what’s with all the typos, Mr. Engineer-and-MBA-and-NRI Investment Banker?

5) Chetan, can I have Ryan’s phone number?

Things Are Just Not What They Seem

~ The Mahajan case, 'nuff said. The town criers have gone to town about it anyway.

~ Picture perfect marriages. How much of a sham(e) behind closed doors?

~ Writers and their writings. How much of it is the truth/imaginary?

~ Academic Grades. Reflection of a student's brilliance/intelligence?

~ Friends. Fair weather seems too mild a description for back-stabbers.

~ Relatives. (Explanation not required).

~ The movie industry and their behind-the-screen shenanigans.

~ Movies & TV Serials. The Sixth Sense & The X Files.

~ Charlie Chaplin. Real life isn't black and white after all.

~ My driver. The bugger has gone missing since 2 hrs, seems to have decamped with my bike.

~ This post. Not exhaustive by a long shot.

New Man in My Life

Found a perfect way to keep me busy while being home-bound. Playin' with this toy boy. He packs a neat punch and keeps me effortlessly occupied.

Meet my new companion, Le Phillipe. Ain't he a handsome dude...sigh...fell hook, line and sinker for his good looks. A very smooth physique and rock hard abs to boot.




And whadya know, Le Phillipe is prudent too...came to me on a bidding! Almost perfect...sigh...

Mr. Sunny Ehruksun, my original choice, will just have to wait a bit longer for my undivided attention.

Citizens Can!

The "Rang De Basanti" effect is what the media is calling it. People protesting in the streets of India has become an integral part of all TV channel headlines of late. It started with the Jessica Lal case, which prodded on by the media, snowballed into actually setting the wheels of justice in motion--that too in India--a humongous achievement. Around the same time, a group (now that the political party has split) called Lok Paritran was formed and fuelled this new-age subconciousness among the Indian youth. And of course, the anti-reservation issue, which is still burning up blogworld, broadcasting media, campuses, drawing room discussions, and a lot of ink everywhere. This page got so many hits in the past coupla weeks, probably more than our very own homegrown Priyanka Chopra got hit on since she scorched up the screen.

In the midst of all this fire and brimstone, came Aamir Khan's support for the victims of the Narmada issue. Rajdeep Sardesai gushed all over the actor, who was earnest to a fault, and yet managed to charm through his dimples. Read the transcript and watch the interview here. Other news channels also had special programs inviting Aamir into their studios to bravely and gravely voice his opinion not on Bollywood, or matters of the heart, or the debacle of Fanaa, but to hear him speak on current affairs. Khushboo, however, got a raw deal and tearfully rendered a public apology for what some termed her "outspokenness" in the media. The irony was that this was the same southern state that had deified this actress by constructing a temple in her name!

Are they for real? Back in school, civics and history classes were all about freedom of speech and believing in the maxim that "democracy is for the people, by the people, and of the people". In today's times, it seems that this country is only for the politicians, by the politicians, and of the politicians, and minus the people altogether. This might sound naive and idealistic, but seriously, what the heck is wrong with the times we live in?

Public memory is short, but hopefully not for just causes. Hope has emerged just as we appeared to be turning into a callous materialistic tech-dependent generation. There is still some soul left in our hearts, even if the flame is but a flicker. Time will tell if this is just a phase.

[In other news, (since this post sounds like a broadcast feed from a newschannel) I managed to break my toe and am now hopping around the house. All laments about accrued leave have been duly taken care of!]