30th September, Day 4
Since I spent most of the day indoors, I decided to make an online contribution towards my participation in the JGW and also in the 7D7G challenge. Much to my disappointment, this plan backfired.
On Day 4, I attempted to make a donation online at the Give India website wherein I can bank a certain amount with them and use it for various causes from time to time, instead of separately picking and choosing organizations and billing them directly. In the latter method, the website has to spend more in terms of time and labor, not to mention their own expenses incurred during administration and disbursement. Unfortunately, despite repeated tries at depositing Rs. 2000, the transaction failed online. I have been a member at Give India since a few years now and it has always been a smooth process. I guess the enthusiasm of Indians during the JGW has contributed to the site's cyber traffic, which is a good thing! I guess I will have to try harder again in the next few days :-)
Meanwhile I signed up at iVolunteer and hope to hear from them sometime soon. Am hoping to volunteer my time and skills to organizations that could utilize the same, and towards causes close to my heart.
Later that evening, I drove to the fuel station and while waiting in queue for filling air into the car's tires, I noticed there was a new worker there. A young man probably in his mid-late 20s, was walking with a limp and circling every vehicle that stopped at the air filling machine. It looked like he had to make quite some effort to walk about and it was painful just to see it, although he was going about his duties in a matter-of-fact manner and at a fairly quick pace. I had already kept aside the usual regular minimum amount of Rs.2 as a tip, but on an impulse, tipped him Rs.5. He might have been surprised because he is usually given Re.1 or Re.2 or nothing at all by most people, but I didn't really stop to see his reaction. Just thanked him, gave him the money and drove away. So that was my only very tiny gesture for the day.
I felt a bit dejected at being unable to fulfil my plans for the day and the only thing that I gave was a couple of measly bucks. Which amounts to nothing really and certainly nothing to write home about. But hey, blogs are for venting! Sigh. Later I mulled over why I didn't give the guy more money; I did hesitate at the time and wondered if he'd feel insulted, after all he was not begging for money, but going about his job. He might have been more shocked than surprised!
All sorts of thoughts, reasons, excuses run amuck through one's head during an act of giving. Not for a minute do we stop and think when we complain about someone/something, we usually just let fly!! Or when we receive (gifts), we do so greedily and bask in the sheer pleasure of it. I'm not saying that's wrong, but just thinking aloud at how we act, react and behave in various situations in our lives. But strangely, while giving at times, especially when people beg at traffic signals, there sometimes is a hesitation, a dilemma whether you should/shouldn't, am I doing the right thing in giving or ignoring, etc. etc. etc...!!
On hindsight, today's (non)experience only made me more determined in my resolve to practice giving as a regular part of my life. Not just during JGW, but to look for and also create more opportunities and bring in more awareness at every possibility. Its actually quite amazing how opportunities just show up in front of you when the intention is strong.
Since I spent most of the day indoors, I decided to make an online contribution towards my participation in the JGW and also in the 7D7G challenge. Much to my disappointment, this plan backfired.
On Day 4, I attempted to make a donation online at the Give India website wherein I can bank a certain amount with them and use it for various causes from time to time, instead of separately picking and choosing organizations and billing them directly. In the latter method, the website has to spend more in terms of time and labor, not to mention their own expenses incurred during administration and disbursement. Unfortunately, despite repeated tries at depositing Rs. 2000, the transaction failed online. I have been a member at Give India since a few years now and it has always been a smooth process. I guess the enthusiasm of Indians during the JGW has contributed to the site's cyber traffic, which is a good thing! I guess I will have to try harder again in the next few days :-)
Meanwhile I signed up at iVolunteer and hope to hear from them sometime soon. Am hoping to volunteer my time and skills to organizations that could utilize the same, and towards causes close to my heart.
Later that evening, I drove to the fuel station and while waiting in queue for filling air into the car's tires, I noticed there was a new worker there. A young man probably in his mid-late 20s, was walking with a limp and circling every vehicle that stopped at the air filling machine. It looked like he had to make quite some effort to walk about and it was painful just to see it, although he was going about his duties in a matter-of-fact manner and at a fairly quick pace. I had already kept aside the usual regular minimum amount of Rs.2 as a tip, but on an impulse, tipped him Rs.5. He might have been surprised because he is usually given Re.1 or Re.2 or nothing at all by most people, but I didn't really stop to see his reaction. Just thanked him, gave him the money and drove away. So that was my only very tiny gesture for the day.
I felt a bit dejected at being unable to fulfil my plans for the day and the only thing that I gave was a couple of measly bucks. Which amounts to nothing really and certainly nothing to write home about. But hey, blogs are for venting! Sigh. Later I mulled over why I didn't give the guy more money; I did hesitate at the time and wondered if he'd feel insulted, after all he was not begging for money, but going about his job. He might have been more shocked than surprised!
All sorts of thoughts, reasons, excuses run amuck through one's head during an act of giving. Not for a minute do we stop and think when we complain about someone/something, we usually just let fly!! Or when we receive (gifts), we do so greedily and bask in the sheer pleasure of it. I'm not saying that's wrong, but just thinking aloud at how we act, react and behave in various situations in our lives. But strangely, while giving at times, especially when people beg at traffic signals, there sometimes is a hesitation, a dilemma whether you should/shouldn't, am I doing the right thing in giving or ignoring, etc. etc. etc...!!
On hindsight, today's (non)experience only made me more determined in my resolve to practice giving as a regular part of my life. Not just during JGW, but to look for and also create more opportunities and bring in more awareness at every possibility. Its actually quite amazing how opportunities just show up in front of you when the intention is strong.
20 comments:
It was a good thing you tipped him more than usual.
I really don't understand why people hesitate to leave a good tip. Last time I was in India, I took a friend and his wife out to dinner at a fancy restuarant of their choice.
I told them I'll pick up the tab and they could consider it as a gift. My friend volunteered to take care of the tip and offered 100 rupees for a 6000 rupees tab. I gave him the stink-eye and told myself not to insult him because his wife was present.
I've seen people pull up their windows at traffic lights. I don't understand how they cannot part with some of their money if it brings a smile on others faces.
V, tipping is not part of the so called culture in India as in the US. There 15% is a bare minimum. Here, besides taxes and surcharge and fancy prices that restaurants charge, people think tipping on top of that is a rip-off. After all, waiters are only doing their job. There's already enough of a bribing culture thanks to the 'babus' in India.
About giving money to people begging, I'm surprised you think it should be encouraged. Everyone knows its an organized business here. Personally I have my own rules when it comes to people begging - I offer money mainly to the aged, the maimed (although this is known to be the worst organized business in begging), and some women who look like they are in a pitiable state, and kids especially li'l girls who work rather than beg. By work I mean they might try selling you something or wipe your car windows, even if its a token gesture. But atleast they aren't doing outright begging. I don't roll down my windows if the person begging looks suspicious...to me atleast. Like I said, sometimes you do it wondering if you've done the right thing by giving or by passing them by. Its complicated. In a way you are encouraging people to just live off others instead of working for their living.
I agree with you about the tipping rules. Here, we do not have any surcharges added to our tab, so leaving a good tip becomes a part of the whole routine.
Agreed, the waiters are doing their job. I'm not sure about India but in the US, they get paid minimum wage (if that) and I was paid minimum wage when I was in school and I even worked at a catering service part-time and I know how much it sucks to see people leaving 1 dollar as tip after refilling their waters twenty times. So, sometimes I go overboard with tipping and leave a 25%. I'm assuming they don't get paid too much in India as well. It is a shitty job to begin with and not to mention some rude customers they have to deal with especially in India.
Now, bribing is a whole different story. I don't think it can be considered to be in the same ballpark as tipping.
As for begging, I know it's an organized business but if I see a woman carrying a baby(even if the baby doesn't belong to her), I don't stop to think if I'm encouraging her to remain unemployed.
If it's a little girl who is offering to clean my windows in exchange for money, I'll flatly refuse her service and just hand her the money. Some people take the service and pay them a meagre amount, what is that about?
Honestly, I don't consider to be a an encouragement for the wrong cause if I handed some money to people at traffic lights. They chose that profession either by force or choice and it doesn't matter to me what made them choose it. All that matters is they are in a worse shape than I am and I don't mind helping out.
Also, if people allow little girls/boys to clean their windows in exchange for money, isn't that encouraging underage employment? In my books, I'd rather see them begging (they truly deserve some easy money) as oppposed to working to earn that money. Do you accept their service when they offer to clean your windows?
I quote the great philosopher Jerry Seinfeld "Now we are tipping people to do their job?"
Dude. You tip IF you are happy with the service. It is not a 'default'.
I disagree. I think the amount can vary based on service.
Some restuarants add a 15% gratuity by default to the tab and they also leave another blank line on the check that says 'Additional tip'. That, in my opinion is wrong, so I neatly write a big zero on that line and sign the check.
V, its different in India.
In India, you tip only if you are happy with the service. And most often than we end up paying a Service Charge which is a decent amount as a part of the bill, which should actually be the tip. Agreed that waiters are paid a meager amount, but we are not here to feed their families. If he wants a good tip, he should be nice to the customer, and earn his 10%, if at all.
Thats how it goes on here.. and as for your friend, I think 100/- is decent for a regular hotel. I am assuming that it should've been a 5-star hotel since the bill was 6000/-, but anything between 200-300/- should be fine for the tip, that too if the waiter is very nice. 15% of 6000/- is a considerable amount for anyone in India.
@Ms. Taggart,
I agree there's a flip side to this coin - some waiters in India are rude to customers. Then again, I still stand firm when I say the amount should vary on the service. The surcharge/service charge are all recorded in the books so that money is not going to the pockets of the waiters who actually served you. A little cash on top would go to them.
15% of 6000 = 900.
My friend was leaving him a 100 rupee note. Good thing I slipped in more money without my friend noticing it.
900/- is not a small amount, V. A family can buy groceries for a week with that money. Converted into dollars, it might not sound big, but its still big money in India.
Like we both agree, it depends on service, but again, 15% is too much!
I stand on 5%, I guess for amounts more than 1000/-. Lesser than that just gets rounded off.
Okay, this is brushing sensitive boundaries. Let's not get into the whole thing about Dollars vs. Rupees. During these times of inflation, I think anything below 10% as a tip would be meaningless.
The waiter/waitresses have familes too. Agreed, they might be getting paid well in five-star restaurants but I've seen people leaving 5 rupees as tip in mediocre resturants when the tab is 200 rupees. How is that fair? If someone left me a 5 rupee tip, I'd stop him at the door and hand him 20 rupees.
If the waiter wants to make more he should have just got a different job. The moral obligation of feeding his family does NOT rest on my shoulders.
Dude, are you serious?
For all you know, this might be a job he's doing out of compromise or circumstance. I'm not suggesting you should assume the responsibility of his family. It's only fair that the tip amount matches the service.
If he/she is outrightly rude, then I agree he doesn't deserve a good tip.
I think I should write a post about this topic. I have so many incidents I can narrate.
One idiot I know left a 10 cent tip on a 30 dollar tab. We walked out the restuarant and he remembered he left his wallet back at the table. He asked me if I could go get it for him. I politely refused.
This tipping subject seems to have stirred up a hornet's nest here!
Begging and tipping are two different areas, with varying viewpoints.
I recently read a blogpost on begging, I agree with some of it...let me repost here for some of you to read and give your opinions.
http://shindeneeraj.blogspot.com/2009/09/true-joy-of-giving.html
As for tipping, my rule is to only tip as per quality of service. And these days its not customers that are rude so much anymore atleast in my city. I eat out often and at various levels of eateries. What's more common is the indifference of waiters to customers and particularly lousy service. I make exceptions on ultra busy days when they are buzzing about and there are delays even if I'm in a hurry. I understand that. But rudeness/indifference is inexcusable. In star hotels/restaurants, the pseudo snootiness by some waiters is even more annoying. When you are completely unhappy with the service, rather lack of it, tipping isn't even worth it.
Rules ARE very different in India, whether tipping or begging. I don't 'allow' the kids to wipe my car windows really, for one, its usually some dirty cloth they use which is worse 'coz then I can't see anything!! What I'm saying is I appreciate that they are attempting to do something, and keeping their self respect and dignity intact. I don't encourage child labour in any form. And I don't buy their stuff although I might give them some money for their efforts. In a way, its like they have done some begging but atleast they are not begging. Its horrible to see that and the sorry lines used. Luckily for me, there are very few at traffic lights in this city, most people begging can be found outside temples. And those get a lot of money and tons of food since people contribute very generously to temples for 'prasad' distribution or even send truckloads of food themselves. Its a free-for-all in those places with the less fortunate clamoring for seconds and thirds and snatching food from your hands et al. A bit scary if you're doing it yourself. So people end up donating to the temple and they organise distribution to the people sitting outside. I've also noticed how that can go wrong too. People jostle each other, scream and shout and the people distributing are also doing the same!!! Its not a pretty sight to witness. The people distributing defend themselves by saying they have to be forceful else the beggars can cause mini-riots!
Wow! India sure has changed from how I remember it. Rudeness never existed and if it did, we would return it on a silver plate. But I guess times have changed and people too.
I'm glad you don't encourage underage employment in any form.
The temple description is depressing.
I'll read the post your referred later.
V, how long have you been away from desh now? Its always amusing to see how NRIs have this very nostalgic impression of India. Boss, this country and its people have changed nearly 360 degrees from whenever you left. Its more like how you choose to remember it. You guys think time stopped here or something.
Oh, no. That was not what I intended to say but it's okay. I get misunderstood and misinterpreted much like some great Nobel laureates.
So, to answer your question, I've been away for 6 years. My reference was toward the way waiters/waitresses respond to customers. Back then, I was broke (that hasn't changed much now)so, I never went to five-star restaurants. Since you said 'various levels of eateries', I was reminded of certain run-down places I would frequent in search of a fulfilling meal. The service was always very friendly even during peak hour. But now it seems as though everyone is trying to make the best of the rat-race so, certain aspects of service, especially in the hospitality industry, occupies the back-burner. That was my point. And I've observed this change in my visits to India.
Do we understand each other?
Good.
And a humble request: Please do not use the term NRI in referring to me. As much as some desis feel proud about it, I think that's too... hmm... what's the politically correct word... gay.
Do you prefer the term FOB then? :P
Hell, no! Now, you are testing my patience.
A simple 'His Highness' would suffice. As you can see, there is no hint of race, location or immigration status in that term. Just pure truth.
Uh-huh! I'm sure I can come up with something better :P
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